Our Personal Shadow

Posted December 7, 2015

             You must go into the dark in order to bring forth your light

While December is filled with holidays and joyful activities, it’s also wintertime.  And winter is a time to look at the darker side of us, the shadow parts of us to get a fullernews
picture of who we are.  So here’s an exercise from William A. Miller in Finding the Shadow in Daily Life.  Don’t be afraid of really going there!

  1. List the qualities you don’t like in others (it’s OK if its lengthy);
  2. Now extract out of that not only what we dislike, but that we despise, horrified by, disgusted by, and loathe. (Although hard to believe, and even harder to accept, this short list is your personal shadow!)

Debbie Ford says that our shadow is long ago formed aspects of us “containing all the parts of ourselves that we have tried to hide or deny, the parts we believe are not acceptable to our family, friends, coworkers, and most importantly, ourselves. The Shadow is comprised of everything annoying, horrifying or disgusting us about other people or about ourselves.  It’s the person we don’t think we are.”

The shadow’s role in our lives.  The shadow has enormous power over our lives: determining what we do or not, what we’re drawn to or repulsed by, what we avoid or love, and what we will judge and criticize.  “Our shadow controls how much success we’re entitled to create or how much failure we’re doomed to experience.  The shadow predicts all of our behaviors, driving the way we treat those around us—and how we treat ourselves.”

Using the shadow.  Ford says that “The shadow is not a problem to be solved or an enemy to be conquered, but a fertile field to be cultivated.  Digging into that soil, you’ll discover the potent seeds of the person you most desire to be.”  She went on to say, “Embrace your shadow and your life will be transformed.  You’re embracing your true self.  Then you will have the freedom to create the life you have always desired.”

Thank you all for taking a small journey into getting to know you better.  For as we know our-selves better, our lives will be richer and even more meaningful.

Warm Regards,

jims sign

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